New Year!

I can't believe how soon the end of this year has approached us! So quickly and so much has happened personally as well as globally. Crazy talk! Well, I think it is safe to say that it has been a real year of mental progression and self-development. The year started as early months of heavy lows and true sadness for what I felt I had lost. At the time, it was hard to see past the new label that I felt trapped by and I was blinkered by MS as a disease. It felt like this new thing was out to destroy me, without permission and I had no choice but to surrender.

Unless you've ever received news like this, that you have to cope with daily, knowing you can't change the fact it is permanent, you have no idea what it is to chew yourself up about it. I have been lucky enough to come into contact and befriend people in similar circumstances, that have to live with life-long conditions and they have inspired me, pushed me and motivated me endlessly and for that I am so grateful. To all the people I have met this year and to everyone who has supported me tirelessly, no words can express my gratitude. For everyone that I love who has not told me it is going to be ok and has not told me that they get it, I thank you. I had a moment with a dear friend back in February, who said something to me that I won't forget. She sat by me and looked me in the eye and said "A good friend is someone who loves you even when it's not ok, so I will love you even when it is not ok". Those words were really what I needed to hear and I know she meant them.

By April, that's when I started picking myself up. I realised I couldn't let this define me and was the beginning of my dedication to learning to meditate and focusing on mindfulness. I've got to say, the colouring books are really pretty, but it is all about the science behind it! Focusing on the present moment and showing some kindness and comfort to yourself as if you were an old friend can change so much. Practising mindfulness can even impact treatment effectiveness and cut back on medication dosage (see Mindfulness For Health by Danny Penman and Vidyamala Burch). I got my spark back and, looking back, I had some really awesome times this year. So I'd like to share some with you.

These are the tulips fields of Amsterdam. This was taken back in April. I was super scared of booking this trip as I was worried about relapsing, but I braved it and it was so worth it! Amsterdam was stunning and me and my friend went to Keukenhoff, the tulip gardens in Amsterdam. It was so beautiful and refreshing to be surrounded by colour and beauty and made me really think about the joys that are still out there to be had.

My friend was studying at Oxford uni and these were the views that we got to enjoy. It was stunning and calming to be here and Oxford as a city has a lot to offer. My friends really picked me up when I didn't want to see anyone or do anything and they took me in and fed me so much cake and walked me through these beautiful parts. We laughed so hard and had so much fun. We went to some cool museums, lounged in the glamour that is Oxford University and enjoyed rooftop cafes too.

My best friend took me to this amazing restaurant in central London. Knowing I am a lover of all things delicious, she knew I would appreciate this fusion of Caribbean and Latin cuisine bundled into a rustic, homely restaurant with James Brown beats and old school R'n'B blaring out it's speakers. Killer meats and satisfying flavours really put a smile on my face. This sounds like a simple pleasure, but anyone that knows me at all knows that food is what truly makes me happy!

Heading down the Main river as I regained my confidence to travel. Germany is one of my favourite countries to visit and alongside the delicious ice creams and wonderful cobbled streets, the botanic gardens were one of my favourite attractions of the city of Frankfurt.

Look how stunning England was this summer. The weather was glorious and the hills just kept rolling. This is Corfe Castle in Swanage. Headed down to the coast after and it was a sight to see. 

The last picture I promise! But that doesn't mean there weren't many more moments that made me feel the richness of life and embrace all this life has to offer. This is my view of the Topkapi Palace in Istanbul, Turkey just as afternoon prayers were being called. This was a hugely spiritual place for me to be and the ambience around the sacred chambers amongst historical religious relics were mind-blowing. I really felt in touch with God and my own personal beliefs and I think for me, being in Turkey itself put so much into perspective. With the ongoing refugee crisis, I came across many people, some younger or the same age as me doing all they could just to survive. It was grounding to have conversations with a couple of them and seeing people doing anything they could merely to live in peace and safety. It really put into perspective what is important in life and how we should never take anything for granted. We should always be thankful for all we have and gracious for all that befalls us, good and bad. We will always have something to be grateful for, so I will always look for it, no matter how big or small the least I will always have to be thankful for is that I am breathing and am in the presence of wonderful human beings.

To everyone reading this, no matter who you are, where you are and what you're going through, have hope a strength. Waste no time on where you can't get it back and make the most of all the moments you are given. To a new year, a peaceful year, a year of prosperity, love and success to all and most importantly, a year of togetherness, compassion and good health. Happy New Year!